While Searching for the ‘One’ don’t overlook the Peter Dinklages.

Okay, for a monstrously tall Amazonian like me, standing at a whopping 5’8″ without heels, try as I might, I just cannot avoid ‘overlooking’ the Peter Dinklages. Why? Well, for obvious reasons.

When I was younger and a little more naive than I am now, I would write elaborate lists about how perfect my Mr.Right would be ( yes I mention him a lot because I was really fooled into believing he was real).

Actually, in retrospect it would appear as if I spent my entire period of adolescence dreaming and fawning over this Mr. Right somebody. Ugh, curse you society and Disney and fucking Hollywood and your contorted representation of reality!

He would be way taller than I am (for sure) so that I can have that fairy-tale inspired ‘head on chest listening to his heart while he ‘clichely’ (so I make words up sue me!) tells me how every time his heart beats it is beating for me’ moment. Gawd, curse you fucking cable.

I was shallow, I was one of those tall girls who swore on the grave of my dead dog ‘Mikey’ that I will never be caught dead dating a guy who was shorter than I was.

Why? well because it just didn’t feel right. A woman was suppose to represent vulnerability, a certain grace and softness, the damsel-eque type.

These qualities will all be complimented with a man whose stature towered over mine.

It would represent his dominance over me, he would be my protector you know my ‘knight in shining armor’!

Besides, the ladies in Hollywood always looked up into their men’s faces, not down, so my man had to be tall dark and handsome (ugh cliche, I know).

Okay probably not, but my reason was about as valid as that non nonsensical bullshit I just spewed. I didn’t have a valid reason as to why, no more than it felt right for me to have a man that was taller. I can go on about what the scientific research says about taller men being more confident, stronger yada yada yada.

Well, life happened, I ‘kinda’ grew ‘up-ish’ and It turns out most tall men are braggadocio assholes –no I do not have enough evidence to substantiate that claim, but I got a Gibbs’ gut… okay fine– all the tall men I’ve encountered!

Anyway, I met my Peter Dinklage in the most unsuspecting of circumstances. We talked casually and not a bone in my body was attracted to this man, for one reason and one reason only; he was too short ( I did say I kinda grew upish remember).

But! We developed a friendship that  bloomed with time. A very long story about how exceptionally great this man is and blah blah blah short (no pun intended, or maybe just a little bit) we are in love (or something like it) and that mental list I had pinned about my dream man having to be yeah high with this or that quality, was mentally incinerated.

 

Here’s what I’ve learned over the course of my dating career:

1. As previously established, Mr. Right does not exist.
2. Everything that glitters ain’t gold, if he’s glittering it’s probably his gold capped teeth.
3. Sometimes, just sometimes maybe 99% of the times, your standards are unrealistically unrealistic.
4. Compromise is something you’ll eventually have to do.
5. Nobody is perfect (I hate this very true, very cliched statement so much).
6. The odds of you ticking all the checks on your list are as good as you finding that needle that everyone is tumbling through the haystack looking for.
7. The ‘One’ doesn’t come with sounding timbrels.
8. He is usually standing there right in front of you.
9. More often than not, he’s probably right under your nose (literally).
10. Okay, so 8 and 9 could have probably all been said under number 7, what the heck, have you never heard of dramatic effect?
11. Looking for the one distracts you from finding the one. (does that even make any sense?)

 

So Ladies I may have been a bit shallow, well a lot shallow, but seriously, don’t overlook those guys.

What about you? What are your views on height in a relationship? How tall are you? Do you have a height preference? is it that serious? let me know…let me know…!